i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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