But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
