I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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