You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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