Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
