i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
