he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Randomize