It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
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Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
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The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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