He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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