Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(304): View more from West Virginia

apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.

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(812): View more from Indiana

she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.

(1-812): View more from Indiana

thatta girl

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(845): View more from New York

don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.

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(281): View more from Texas

She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes

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(240): View more from Maryland

I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.

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(218): View more from Minnesota

You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?

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