I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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