HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
