is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
