bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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