I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize