Buhtt sex?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Bring me that man meat
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
