I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize