is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I just googled if crying burns calories
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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