my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
