I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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