normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
