We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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