Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
