dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
