Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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