the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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