wakey wakey hands off snakey
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
My cat gives me a boner
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
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