I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize