Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
