She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
