remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
