Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Randomize
