My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
