it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
