worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
