so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
