Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.