Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
