spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
