U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
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Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
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On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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