Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
