so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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