Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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