Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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