This is not my ceiling
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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