and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
