Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Randomize
