yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
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