atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
