i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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