So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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