Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point. http://tfl.nu/cpsh
  Replies (31) Good night (2523) Bad night (3209)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester. http://tfl.nu/q7xe
  Replies (31) Good night (5962) Bad night (2237)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously http://tfl.nu/fxay
  Replies (28) Good night (3414) Bad night (1456)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth. http://tfl.nu/5m3k
  Replies (41) Good night (9688) Bad night (3551)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian http://tfl.nu/9eu3
  Replies (30) Good night (7010) Bad night (3002)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold. http://tfl.nu/adho
  Replies (4) Good night (2104) Bad night (1066)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now. http://tfl.nu/a4db
  Replies (2) Good night (1683) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  i just like, need to vent to someone

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): i just like, need to vent to someone (919): Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you? http://tfl.nu/t3kk
  Replies (14) Good night (2849) Bad night (2030)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape. http://tfl.nu/kj0n
  Replies (3) Good night (1657) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (517): Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler http://tfl.nu/xejb
  Replies (4) Good night (1155) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed. http://tfl.nu/vekr
  Replies (5) Good night (1019) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it. http://tfl.nu/qtph
  Replies (9) Good night (799) Bad night (536)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada http://tfl.nu/dfei
  Replies (1) Good night (731) Bad night (399)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car http://tfl.nu/h2al
  Replies (11) Good night (597) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won. http://tfl.nu/zieh
  Replies (1) Good night (605) Bad night (297)

Randomize