That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.